Univited and PROUD of it!

Do you remember when you were a kid and you didn't get invited to some event?  Perhaps that snotty, red-haired girl was having a pool party and all of your friends were going, but somehow you never received an invitation.  Or maybe your buddies from the soccer team decided to hang out after the big win over your school's rivals and they forgot to mention that to you.  Even as an adult, have you felt left out?

Since coming out to my family, I have been very, very surprised with their reactions.  For the most part, I have had nothing but support.  In fact, one of my brothers in particular has really made me feel more than welcome into his home, having me over for dinner on several occasions since my "coming out party."  He calls me now and again, and probably we are closer than we were before he knew about my life.  In contrast to that, one of my siblings has cut me out of their world.  Another brother (I will refer to him as M), never speaks to me anymore.  He was the one that I thought was the most forward-thinking and conscientious.  I thought at first that his initial reaction was a fluke and that things would get better, but I have tried to contact him three or four times and he never returns my calls. 

About a year ago I found out that his then seventeen year old daughter is also gay.  Needless to say, his reaction was very poor and for a while he had actually kicked her out of his house (shame on him).  I heard that they somewhat reconciled and she ended up back home for her senior year of high school.  Which brings me to the subject of this blog...my niece just graduated...at the top of her class, I might add...and I wasn't invited to her commencement ceremony. 

There is a huge part of me that feels really bad about it, but not for myself of course, but for my niece.  But there is also a very determined part of me that refuses to be affected by M's ignorance.  I truly feel that my absence from his life is his loss.  He has no idea who I am, he has never seen any of my artwork or heard me play with the PSO...he has never met my beautiful and brilliant wife or seen they way she makes me smile...he has no idea that I am proud of who I have become.